HALFWAY THERE – OH YEAH!
20 weeks has been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, tbh. We had our scan on Wednesday which was amazing – Baby Allison is developing perfectly, everything is looking as it should and she’s now the size of a mango. I’m feeling her movements more and more and feel really ‘connected’ to her… I can envisage her as part of our lives now and it’s so, so exciting.
So the highs are glorious… but there are lows, too. My emotions are all over the place, particularly when it comes to decision-making. I had an epic breakdown earlier today when we realised Ikea don’t do breakfast on Sundays… I just couldn’t grasp the thought of eating anywhere else (why?! Ikea breakfasts aren’t even that nice!) and I was so angry that my well-laid plan had fallen through. I cried all the way home and sobbed into Rob’s shoulder for 20 minutes, then I was over it and was happy to eat wherever. Suddenly plunging into despair is really unlike me and it feels pretty alarming, so I keep having to remind myself about hormones and growing an extra brain and all that stuff. As much as I’m trying to live exactly as I did pre-pregnancy I know I need to make allowances and be kind to myself, because emotionally (and physically, but that’s easier for me to deal with) I’m not the same as before and this massive thing that’s happening is bound to change me a little bit.
So! 20 weeks has been a bit of a weird one, but 21 weeks is just around the corner and it all keeps moving forward. Next weekend I’m going to a wedding which I’m really looking forward to – I’ve got an on-point outfit and I can’t wait to feel a bit dressed up. And now we’ve got the all-clear from the scan, we can start buying things for the nursery (which I am STOKED to get started on) and important stuff like the pram… and we’re getting a new kitchen installed so I’m going wild on Pinterest planning everything down to the smallest detail. Hooray for nesting!